I have been thinking lately how great a mother's/parent's love for a child is. Before having Caleb, I could not fathom it. But now sometimes I sit there holding him, or looking at him, or just thinking about him, and I am overwhelmed with love for him.
Sometimes I think my next kid will be shortchanged. They won't have all of the one-on-one time that we have had with Caleb, and I sure won't have all of the time to just devote to that one child. It kind of makes me sad. But I'm sure it'll be better than I think!
Aren't kids great!!
6 comments:
I felt the same way after Brianna was born. Especially when I found out I was pregnant with Tori. I was so worried that I would never be able to love her that much. I cried many times about that.
After they are here, you see that God has an awesome way of giving you more love! It is not like you are taking away from one to give to another, but kinda like the baskets of fish and bread, you just keep getting refilled!
I would even say that I love more now. I think it is because I have a new avenue to love seeing them interact with each other and helping mold each other into who they are!
All of this to say that I completely understand, but you will love just as much!!
Are you trying to tell us something?
No, not trying to tell you anything at all! The Carroll family still has awhile before it will be ready for another member of the family. :)
Kristi is totally right! I felt the same way after having you, but it's just incredible how God actually multiplies your love. God IS love, so I guess that really makes sense. It's interesting how God uses the whole kid thing to help us understand Him more.
Mom
My mom always said she had this same fear when she had my oldest sister. She was so in love with her & couldn't imagine having more kids because she didn't think she would be able to love them as much. But, of course, you do & I never even felt the least bit neglected or short changed.
It's funny because I never had this feeling with twins. I guess I had to share my time with them from day one, so I never felt that they were getting the short end of the stick. BUT... I did feel this way with Nick. I always thought he would be so neglected because he had to share the spotlight with his siblings. I would never be able to focus on just Nick. While I sometimes think this is still true, I don't think it affects the amount of love I feel for each of my kids.
Something beautiful Ron put into words very early on in our relationship was that his love for me does not diminish his love for Sue (his late wife), and my love for him does not diminish my love for Don (my late husband and Chris' dad). Our hearts being full of love for so many is very God-given, and we are definitely made in his image!! Kristi and Beverly, you are so insightful!
I love each of my three boys individually without measure as well as the "persons" they become in tandem with one another and with their dad...and I love each of their beautiful wives in such a special way as I do Ron's daughter, Becca, and her Glenn, AND CALEB!!
And ya know, there is still so much love to overflow to the others in the family, to friends, to our spiritual family, to co-workers and to people we interact with day in-day out.
I have a friend that had 4 kids, and she and her husband did a neat thing: they each had individual "dates" with each of their kids that lasted 1-2 hours...just doing what that child wanted to do. Whether it was swinging at the park, baking cookies for an elderly friend, writing a letter to grandma, practicing ball, playing a game, reading together, and later on dinner dates or sport dates...the other kids knew that was their sibling's time with Mom or Dad alone and honored it...they knew they had a special time coming. It took committment and creativity as a couple and as parents to build separate relationships with their kids and as well as a "whole" family. They still are extremely close as a family, and you will never hear "Well, Daddy loved you best".
When you have each of your children, you think you could never love one more...but you do! Then in time God answers your lifelong prayers for them to find just the right "daughter" or "son" to share their lives with and for you to love; then come those most precious grandchildren and God's joy in your life just seems to keep bubbling up and overflowing to everyone around you.
Thank you, Beverly and Mitch, for instilling God's love in Steph, so she would become God's answer to this mother's prayer for just the right person to love Chris completely and be the wonderful mother that she is to my "GRAND" Caleb!!!
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